Sunday, December 1, 2013

People Are Sick

Being sick, you guys. It's never fun.

In our household -and in the homes of several of our close friends - we've been steadily rotating in and out of stomach bugs and full blown bronchitis for at least two full weeks. Let me tell you, I am SO done.

With the sickness, that is. Because I'm nowhere near done with anything else. In fact, I feel as if I've accomplished zero otherwise. You should see the size of the dust bunnies we're living with. They're more like dust Bullmastiffs and I imagine they're evolving into sentient beings as I type. It's shameful.

Despite the persistent hacking and general malaise I've been experiencing, I was finally able to muster the will to open iMail and get some work done last night. However, I was quickly met with The Spinning Beach Ball of Death - aka, The Marble of Doom - the technological equivalent of a foggy "try again later" from a poorly weighted Magic Eight Ball, repeating the same answer again and again. It's one of the few things that can make my fists and jaw involuntarily clench in unison.

Lately, it feels a whole lot like my ancient Mac is telling me,
"You needn't bother, muh friend. Nothing to see here. Go suck an egg."

Let's just cut to the chase.

photo source

Because I'm feeling so puny, I quickly acquiesced and barreled merrily down the rabbit hole instead, as I tend to do when I just can't seem to focus. It's typically a brief distraction from which I usually return refreshed and ready to kick some serious tuchus.

Not this time. In fact, I do believe I may've ingested most of the cute kids category, a great deal of the silly kitty set, and, quite possibly, the entirety of the "wisdom teeth anesthesia" genre. Like this one from Laurel Rothamel which reflects quite well the way others have described to me my post-surgical demeanor: mercurial, silly, paranoid, weepy, and a tad sloppy. But I think she pulls it off. Don't you?

Cute right?

Sometimes, I feel conflicted about the Internet. On occasion, I've even toyed with the idea of pulling the kill switch and unplugging forever - maybe starting a life in the woods amongst the foxes. But ultimately, after about three days, I begin to distrust the woods and while foxes look cute in the snow, I'm not sure we speak the same language.

So, I think of the Internet as being kind of like the girlfriend you want to give the ol' heave-ho because she announces that your thighs are getting flabby and tells really off-color jokes at inappropriate moments but you can't because, well, she's technically right and the jokes are actually kinda funny. Plus, there's just "so much more to her". So, you keep her around...for now.

While it may be overly populated with awful trolls who are sick in a much different way and terrible people use it for some horrible purposes (AND it offers me a bottomless well of distraction, for better or worse) it never fails to deliver when, what I really need, like, RIGHT NOW, is a feel-good story or a little chuckle. That, or to check in on the cats at Tenth Life.

If you're also feeling rough during this awful flu season, I really am so sorry. I'd wipe the drool and tears from your face if I could. But maybe a trip down the rabbit hole is just what the doctor ordered. And, hey, you can save your copay because this one's on the house.

See you there!


Oh, and before you scamper off, please do tell: have you had your wisdom teeth out? As it turns out, I'll never get them. Sadly, that means I'll never have a video just like Laurel's. Please tell me what it was like for you. Any videos floating around that I need to see?

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